It's not really something I'd realized I was keeping a secret. However, to make a point about judging others by our standards and our perception of their failings and sin, I announced to the world that I do not believe in punishing children.
Where do I go from here?
I have an impulse to explain myself, to say things like - I was almost never punished as a child and I'm not a serial killer, or talk about the latest psychological findings in the area, quote books I've read, even point out where in the bible translations, assumptions and culture have marred the very message of our Lord to our hearts. But I don't think I will. Not now, at least.
Suffice to say I think punishment is a sinful desire to control the behavior of another. I have never been punished by my savior or heavenly father, nor have I always been saved from the natural course of my decisions. Christ has taken all my punishment. I am simultaneously worthy and unworthy, guilty and blameless. In this tension, I hope to grow closer to my creator.
Our pastor, Joe, said one day he brought his three children into his study - one by one. His first, his son, he asked "What is the most important thing I've taught you? What is most important about life?" "Always do the right thing," his son answered.
I have failed, Joe thought.
He brought his second son in and asked again. "What is the most important lesson I've taught you about life?" "Always do what's right. Follow the rules," said the second son.
I have failed again.
His youngest, his daughter, came in next. Again he asked, "what is the most important thing?" he asked. "Jesus will always love me," she said.
Truly, I want the most important thing in my son's mind to be that Jesus loves him. I don't want him spending his life trying to mimic the fruit of righteousness. You can paint a rock red and tie it to a vine, but it's a far cry from a ripe tomato. You cannot punish a child into loving God or himself or you or his neighbors you can only punish him into feigning such things. Therefore I hope to disciple my children in the limited ways a sinner can so that they are pointed to God's mercy and love. The world has enough pain to teach the lessons the world demands. Mercy is not taught through a lack of grace.
And that's my opinion.
Where do I go from here?
I have an impulse to explain myself, to say things like - I was almost never punished as a child and I'm not a serial killer, or talk about the latest psychological findings in the area, quote books I've read, even point out where in the bible translations, assumptions and culture have marred the very message of our Lord to our hearts. But I don't think I will. Not now, at least.
Suffice to say I think punishment is a sinful desire to control the behavior of another. I have never been punished by my savior or heavenly father, nor have I always been saved from the natural course of my decisions. Christ has taken all my punishment. I am simultaneously worthy and unworthy, guilty and blameless. In this tension, I hope to grow closer to my creator.
Our pastor, Joe, said one day he brought his three children into his study - one by one. His first, his son, he asked "What is the most important thing I've taught you? What is most important about life?" "Always do the right thing," his son answered.
I have failed, Joe thought.
He brought his second son in and asked again. "What is the most important lesson I've taught you about life?" "Always do what's right. Follow the rules," said the second son.
I have failed again.
His youngest, his daughter, came in next. Again he asked, "what is the most important thing?" he asked. "Jesus will always love me," she said.
Truly, I want the most important thing in my son's mind to be that Jesus loves him. I don't want him spending his life trying to mimic the fruit of righteousness. You can paint a rock red and tie it to a vine, but it's a far cry from a ripe tomato. You cannot punish a child into loving God or himself or you or his neighbors you can only punish him into feigning such things. Therefore I hope to disciple my children in the limited ways a sinner can so that they are pointed to God's mercy and love. The world has enough pain to teach the lessons the world demands. Mercy is not taught through a lack of grace.
And that's my opinion.
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